In spite of whinging about the absolutely awful 'new' Parenthood Package, the husband and I have decided to extend our brood. It has nothing to do with answering the government's call to add 1,000 more babies in 2009 and everything to do with the fact that my aging body needs to complete its reproduction function a.s.a.p.
Ok ok! I admit, we weren't trying to get pregnant (at least not until Feb/Mar 09 so the next baby's EDD is timed later in the year, like Arissa or me). As with Arissa, "IT JUST HAPPENED" seems to best describe the situation. I suspect it had to do with the hormone pills I took in September to entice my eggs out of hibernation. Perhaps too many popped out unexpectedly.. because voila! that once familiar nausea and mild tummy cramps again ruled the days, and nights, come November. This is the story of trimester numero uno:
2 Nov 08, Sunday
Brushed my teeth that morning and started dry retching- what's this?! Told husband to buy a test kit from Guardian along with Sunday breakfast. He came home looking sheepish and .. sort of scared looking. Hee, too late now! Within 30 seconds we saw the line that confirms my suspicion.
8 Nov 08, Saturday
Bad Bad Bad.. Arissa's birthday chalet and all I wanted to do was, well...nothing. Exhausted doesn't come close to describing what I felt that Monday morning.
13 Nov 08, Thursday
Popped into Lawrence Ang's. Again. He appeared surprised that we have again conceived unexpectedly, given that I suffer from PCO. 6 weeks and 6 days, position ok, growth fine, it's looking good! Little Astronaut looks like... well.. a dugong. A little sack with a small circle for the head and a longer oval for the body.
17-26 Nov 08, Tuesday
Woozy all the time and totally flat out by 7pm. My 'morning' sickness is worst at night, starting from around 6pm. In the daytime, the usual acrid taste in my mouth makes me want to gag in the office and let the whole world know I'm preggers. Haven't told bosses yet but MD has asked me countless times "Are you pregnant? Are you like... late?" which was too funny.
I haven't been able to deal with Arissa as she is becoming oh-so-boisterous now and a little too heavy to handle (all of 16kg). I'd end up losing my temper and smacking her for a small fuss so Hafidz has been doing all the Daddy things like showering and changing her and fixing her milk (yep, things he should've been doing from ages ago). All I do is wait for her in bed and read her a bedtime story before snuggling up together in her tiny bed. I'm trying to accustom her to her bed before baby arrives- what a disaster to have 2 kids in bed with you at night! But this has got to be damaging on my spine.
We've gradually introduced Arissa to the concept of 'adik' and the 'baby' in Mummy's tummy. I think she understands because when I ask her to "kiss adik?" she will push up my top to reveal my tummy and bend down to kiss my bellybutton. Hope she doesn't equate
bellybutton = adik.
3 Dec 08
When I was pregnant with Arissa, I remember clearly having vomited only on two occasions- once at Arab Street after dinner with Izzah & Alfie/Sapna & Anil; the other when Hafidz made me eat bread dunked in a glass of hot Milo (he believes this cures gastric- ya right! I puked so much it came out of my nose!).
By today, I've officially exceeded my previous pregnancy's threshold. I've forced myself to vomit on 4 occasions, all in public toilets which are in itself vomit-inducing. Sanah, once again my pregnancy mentor and who is 7 months preggers herself, thinks this pregnancy is more challenging because its a boy.. I secretly hope so!!! But when I brought it up to Hafidz, he brushed it aside with a "Doesn't matter la Na, boy or girl, as long as it's healthy".
15 Dec 08
This is the week of endless self-questioning:
Fidza told me about this prayer to be performed before the foetus is 3 months by the husband to 'request' God for a baby boy. Ok yes I know.. Science dictates that gender is determined from the point of conception but miracles do happen riiiight!? ..and what better way for a miracle to happen than with God's will? Now I wonder if I should bring this up to Hafidz as it requires him to place his hand over my belly and pronouncing the prayer. Uh oh.. I can imagine the look on his face right now- not so much incredulity, more "why fix something that ain't broken".
In that same book, there is a mention that male gynaecologists are only allowed in times of darurat (emergency). In other non-emergency situations, a female obstetrician is a better option. Do I believe this fully or should I seek a 2nd opinion? I really like my current gynae but the internal exams were kind of embarrassing last time..
28 Dec 08
Shabanah's birthday party @ Loyang View. The buffet stretch was irresistable- BBQ crabs, BBQ corn, fried rice, chappati, kheema, bubor pulot hitam, satay.... :)
It must be so funny to see 2 pregnant women- 1 barely looking it, the other halfway there- eating continuously for 45 minutes at a stretch. Amzhar & Hafidz were beyond amused, looking at Yani & me but who cares, we're both in our 2nd trimester, albeit at different points of it, and are actually now able to eat!! Yippee...
6 Jan 09
Another visit to gynae, EDD's now been pushed from 4 Jul to late Jun. Baby's too long and heavy to be 13 weeks, says Lawrence. He tried scanning for gender- it does look like it could be another girl but he says it's still to early at this point to be sure.
I'm not sure how I honestly feel then, lying there listening to my baby's heartbeat. It's terrible that I should feel this way but there was a teensy bit of disappointment at first. I come from a 50-50 gender split family unit so in my warped mind a boy would close the gender gap and concurrently, complete our family unit. Hafidz comes from a family of boys so he doesn't think this is strange at all. Pah.
I begrudgingly admitted my thoughts to him and in his strangely comforting pep talk, urged me to think about how Arissa will have a sister (that I myself never had), barely 3 years in age difference to hang out with- now wouldn't that be lovely? They can share clothes and shoes, like he and his brother Haridz does, and go out together without me ever worrying excessively. And besides, he admits... having never handled a girl sibling his entire life, girls are a whole lot cuter and more affectionate than boys.
Ok Daddy, point(s) taken. However it turns out, I'm sure its for the best. Mummy just needs to get over it and start thinking positively (';').